Archive for October, 2007

27
Oct
07

Premature Halloween Bash

I went to a party last night, completely not knowing what to expect. Which is good, to show up with no expectations, it is hard to be disappointed. I hardly believe that I would have been disappointed. I kinda went all out… some would say a little too far…. that is all relative I guess…. but I like to have a costume that I am proud of… in that I succeeded.

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I don’t think I really took it too far… What I really wanted was something that would go along with my beard… and it started out as a vision of a “dirty Bandido” thing… but as I started thinking about it my imagination kinda took a different angle on it… I like it… but back to the party.

It was at a friends girlfriends house, not that Mindie isn’t my friend, but I still don’t know here that well… so when we were invited to this party I figured there would be a whole bunch of people I didn’t know and some that I did know…. plus my brother, Dan, likes to increase his odds and invited our younger brother Matt and our friends Haley and Scott (I wish Tasha could have come)…. I feeling the same way about the odds, invited my friend Megan…. who I hardly know…. boy did she not know what she was getting into. I showed up and Megan was already there… which I kinda felt bad about cause she only knew one other person there besides me…. but at least she knew one person…. I made my grand entrance gun blazing, good kicks… and after awhile Dan and his posse (I mean that in a old western movie sense and not in the way that rappers use it… which is kinda dumb)… any way they showed up and all Hell broke lose… Matt (Roy Rogers, King of the cowboys)
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… he had already been celebrating and was quite inebriated…. He was truly the entertainment for the night. He started the night off by talking about his balls… yes, no joke… he had lately had an experience with a hernia and feels that everyone should know about it…. the shocker was when I looked over and saw Matt talking to Mindie’s Dad… fear gripped me, and I thought how can I possibly explain this… this is just soo out of line…. Matt has gotten us into some pretty sticky situations, but this was the most embarrassing, in front of recently obtained friends… as it turns out her dad was a urologist and quite comfortable with the subject matter… It amazes me how lucky Matt is… It is like he is made of Teflon… Next thing you know they have broken out the karaoke machine… and Matt can’t help himself… so everyones attention is on him and they hand him a live microphone… but don’t have the music part figured out yet… dead air would be a daunting ordeal for most people, but not Matt, He starts doing stand up and hitting on these girls that we have never met beforegirls
… and we definitely didn’t know their respective husbands and boyfriendsguys… But this is of no interest to Matt…. in his best Rodney Carington -Carlos man of love voice, “Hey, you in the blue Dress… how would you like to be the lucky lady that gets to dance with Roy Rogers… no need to be shy… no… how about you…. you feeling lucky… you want to dance…” “How about dancing with my husband?”….. “…uh…no… I will not dance with him. He is cute, but he is not my type… you don’t mind if I dance with your girl though, do you?…” Their boyfriends took it well, they thought he was pretty funny. By the end of the night Dan and Matt were pistol whipping each other… until Matt broke one of the toy guns over Dan’s head…. all in all I had a blast one of the best parties I’ve been to… no fights… I hope Megan had a good time… some times my family is too much… I was a little embarrassed, but over all real proud of them. Good Show… Good Kicks… still have a four days ’till Halloween.

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15
Oct
07

Tourist

I went to San Fransisco this weekend with my brother, his wife, and my mom… It was a blast… On Saturday we drove down and went to a friends wedding outside of Stockton(where I thought I was gunna get shot (the Taco Bell had bullet proof glass)… It was fun… interesting at least… it’s not like I was invited in the first place… it was a small wedding…like under 50 people…so kinda uncomfortable for me at least… but totally worth it… then we went to San Fransisco to see my cousin. We were gunna hit some bars, but it was late and a long day to boot, so we ended up staying in…
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We had fun. The next day Brian bought us the best breakfast ever, and the Dan drove us around…
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So we could see some sites…
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It crossed my mind getting a sweatshirt….
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but…. They were $15… and I didn’t really want to look like a tourist….
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04
Oct
07

Indicators That God Likes You

How do you really know if God likes you… well for me a good indicator is if he gives you cool stuff*. ( you should probably know that I am in no way a religious adviser and nobody in any way should head my religious advice.) As I was saying “cool stuff,” like say…. 12 cans of Cheez-it (name brand) Pasteurized Cheese Snack ( you know like the cheez wiz in a can stuff that you can put on crackers and stuff). Wow… this just so happens to have happened to me. Well not just me, my whole house hold, and I didn’t actually receive them personally, my roommate did. “But what…” you might say, “are you going to do with 12 cans of Pasteurized Cheese Snack?” Well put it on crackers of course… and… uh… play with the cans and take some pictures…
Cheeeze

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*DISCLAIMER: I’ve never really know God to play favorites and “cool stuff” is not an indicator that God likes you or anybody else… I happen to know that God loves everybody and does not reward or punish with Pasteurized Cheese Snacks, nor is he affiliated with any other such reward/punishment system.

p.s. God… I’m not trying to make fun of you, I was just attempting to be funny. Oh, and thanks for the Pasteurized Cheese Snack.

01
Oct
07

The look of a killer…. the face of death

this is my look of a killer..
the look of a killer
I call this one the face of death…
The face of death
Despite how convincing these photos my be… something is lacking…. the last three weeks, every free moment I have had, I have been out in the woods… scouting for deer and hunting for Quail, Grouse, Gray Squirrels, and Unprotected Mammals… (which I thought was any mammal without a gun, but it turns out it only includes: badger, coyote, gophers, moles, mountain beaver, yellowbellied marmots, nutria, opossum, porcupine, spotted skunk, striped skunk, and weasel…. moles?…who the hell hunts moles?)… So the possibilities of what I can kill was pretty much open… plus deer season opened up on Saturday which adds one more possibility to the list…. and yet I have a grand total of zero kills…. I have taken unsuccessful shots at one gray squirrel, and one lucky quail…. I am a lousy hunter… I haven’t killed anything…. well if you find yourself out in the woods dressed like a deer or an unprotected mammal and you happen to see me…. you are probably still pretty safe… watch out for the rest of the hunters… especially Alex, Dan, and Dustin… certified killers…