19
Jun
07

Searching for my porpoise in life

Yah… I know… my spelling sucks…. but who cares when you don’t know where you belong in this world.

porpoise vs purpose

So I have recently had a bit of an “identity” crisis…. I mean who am I… why am I here… what is my purpose… what is the point…. I recently (6 months ago) started going back to school… trying to make something of myself… do something right finally. It was great. I had stuff to do; homework and such. Not that I actually did most of it, but I was supposed to at least. Most of the time I spent screwing off…. making videos, looking up crazy stuff on the internet, going camping/fishing… what ever… but at least I had purpose… “I was supposed to be doing homework”… now school is out for summer… Alice Cooper is really old and doesn’t comfort me anymore, and I basically feel worthless…. I have nothing that I “need” to do. Sure I’ve been out to the Illinois once last Saturday… I went over to Scott and Tasha’s and helped them with their tile in their bathroom…. I’ve been working… doing concrete for my friend Jesse… but when I’m done with work or fun trip to the river… I have no purpose…. I kind of get bored… I try to get on the internet and waste time, like I did during school…. but since I’m not avoiding anything, there is hardly any point… It’s not near as fun…. I can’t even stand it. I need a project… I need something bigger than myself… who knows like maybe swimming with dolphins or somthin’…. I’ve always said that all I need to be purfectly happy in life is a Barbecue and a trampoline. I bought my barbecue a year ago… but I still haven’t got that trampoline…. I think that is what is really bothering me… I’m really not in a place in my life that facilitates the purchase of a trampoline…. but if there is anyone out there that has one that I could maybe come over and jump on… maybe like two times a week.. or something…. I think that would help me out…. give me something to live for… yah know what I mean.

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